Do You Want to Change a Relationship? Don't do this!

Relationships are precious to me.  Like trust they take time to build but are easy to destroy.  To have a relationship is to have a significant association or connection.

One thing I have found that can change a relationship is a thing called money.  It is said that money only magnifies who a person really is.  Many of times individuals have asked to borrow money from me.  In the past I would enter into these agreements with the trust that the other party would live up to their end of the agreement and pay me back as promised. Unfortunately, the other party "forgets" they owe me or would even take it to the extreme by avoiding me altogether to get out of repaying their debt!! To add insult to injury I would hear of these same individuals buying things for themselves, going on trips, or improving their lifestyles with the money they "promised" to repay me!

When it comes to debt there are not a lot of good things the bible has to say about it.  Is debt a salvation issue?  Absolutely not!  It's just that it is not wise and in fact is considered dangerous to operate in debt.  Consider the following verse from the book of Proverbs.  Proverbs 11:15 says, "It's a dangerous thing to guarantee payment for someone's debts.  Don't do it!"  Money gives you options.  When an individual has debt, they limit their options.

Loaning money to individuals will more than likely change the relationship between you and the individual you are loaning money to.  Proverbs 22:7 says, "The poor are ruled by the rich, and those who borrow are slaves of moneylenders".  A good rule of thumb I use is that if I can't give the money to someone as a gift I don't loan it to them.   I don't believe in debt so why would I want to put an individual into the position of a "slave" or one who is "indebted" to me.  That is changing and in some instances destroying our relationship.

Another thing to avoid at all cost is co-signing on someone else's loan.  Whether that's cosigning with someone for a credit card, car loan, Parent-plus loan (parents cosigning on their children's student loans), etc.  DON'T DO IT!!  I hope I'm clear.  A Federal Trade Commission study found that 50 percent of cosigners for bank loans ended up making the payment.  The figure rose to 75 percent for finance company loans!!

How many cosigners do you think expected to make the payments when they agreed to cosign?  Cosigning frequently obligates you to something you didn't anticipate. In fact the lender is making the borrower get a co-signer because they know the borrower is not likely to pay so the lender goes after the co-signer for payment.  What a way to ruin a relationship!

No wonder the bible uses strong language regarding this.  Proverbs 17:18 says "It's stupid to guarantee someone else's loan."

The only debt I subscribe to would be what Romans 13:8 says, "Owe no man anything, but to love one another."

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What are your thought's on loaning money to others? Answer in the comment section below.